14 ways to skip shallow small talk and have deep conversations

Ngày đấy anh nói với em rồi. Whatever you say, writes Joshua Evans, "avoid the awful opening phrase, 'What do you do?'" You'll put your conversation partner in a box where all he can talk about is his job. Instead, Evans says you should ask, "What makes you a badass? That will induce a chuckle over drinks." You might even find out something crazy; perhaps they're a lawyer by day and a rock musician by night. In fact, in France, asking someone what they do for a living is considered a faux pas. The French often ask each other about where they like to vacation.

So it's three degrees colder than average for March. Big deal. "Avoid [talking about the weather] like the plague. It's like the black hole of shallow conversation," says Ambra Benjamin, a recruiting leader at Facebook. "If you assume that there is any possibility that the other person might be dull or will talk stupid, maybe you won't ask things that draw them out in the right way and YOU will ruin the discussion by making it dull," writes Tobias C. Brown. In other words, assume the other person is just as eager to have meaningful conversations as you are. If you approach every conversation as an opportunity to convert people to your values and beliefs, you'll probably have a hard time getting anyone to stick around. After all, no one likes to feel like they're being proselytized. "Don't have too much of an investment in being right or persuading people to adopt your point of view," says Joel Postman. Instead, be open to hearing about your partner's ideas and at least trying to understand her perspective.

DATE: 21/01/2015

CLIENT: Jeeves Design

TAGS: Brand Design, Graphics

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